Saturday 9 July 2011

8 Things I Learnt From Glastonbury




As the novelty of regaining the use of running water wears off, and the fear of finding a surprise on the back of a toilet seat abates (do people seriously have such bad aim?), I thought I'd share my top eight festival tips with those who are just about to dip their toe into the final waves of this summer's festivals, with Latitude, Leeds/Reading, and Bestival still yet to come.

1. First of all - wellies. Wellies, wellies, wellies. You really don't need to be a hardcore festivaler to realise that wellies are THE essential item for any time spent in a field longer than 10 minutes. But lo and behold every year there's one mad person who thinks that their trainers, or flip flops (yes, flip flops) can withstand the onslaught of mud. DO NOT BE THIS PERSON. This year the queue to the entrance was littered with abandoned Keds and Converse. There's nothing sadder than a single trainer encased in mud, being trampled on by wellies again, and again, and again...

2. Socks. Bring socks. Lots of them. They are your wellie's friends. Especially the to-the-knee kind, as they stop the wellies from rubbing your calves at the top. This especially includes the boys, as they're less inclined to wear long socks. I saw some pretty sore legs around the site, including one guy who was practically carving away at his skin. Not pretty. If you don't want to wear socks, turn the top of your wellies over, which should stop any unwanted chaffing.

3. Layers. All good things have layers. Cakes for example. Take heed of this king of desserts and layer up. If it's too hot you can take one off, and if it's too cold just pop one back on. Think dress - hoodie - poncho for the girls or t-shirt - hoodie - poncho. With the added benefit that it's impossible to be unhappy in a poncho.

4. British weather is crazier than. Pack for all weathers, well, heavy showers and extreme sunshine. This year Glastonbury was marked by heavy downpour for the first two days and then glorious sunshine the next, making it more fickle than my Nan with a box of Roses. A lightweight mac, kag, or poncho are always good to whip out when the clouds start to form, and suncream for when they start to disappear.

5. Choice of Alcohol. Cider, beer or wine boxes are normally the usual festival tipple, but be warned - drinking 5 cans of cider whilst watching your favourite band on the main stage, might not be the best idea when the nearest portaloos are 15 elbow digging, and crowd maneuvering minutes away. Oh and don't think about bringing Tequila. Without the salt and lime it doesn't make anybody happy, and you'll just end up bringing it back home with you. (True story)

6. Babywipe Showers. So effective you'll consider giving up the real thing. Kind of.

7. Toilet Paper. None of the toilets will have it, so bring it with you, and guard it with your life.

8. No matter how many pages magazines dedicate to 'Festival Fashion' or 'Festival Chic' you will not be able to achieve the same look, and will stare down with absolute hatred those that do. And no matter what the magazines say, DO NOT wear a playsuit/jumpsuit to a festival. You know how you have to get naked to go to the toilet? Well imagine that but in a portaloo. In the dark. Best to leave the onesie at home.

But the best advice I could give is to just embrace everything. You're muddy and your feet are wet, so what? You're stood watching a band that you've been dying to see, in a field with thousands of people who feel exactly the same as you, singing their hearts out. Amazing.

See you in 2013.

6 comments

  1. Really enjoyed reading this - I did NOT think of that about playsuits! I actually don't want to imagine what getting out of one would be like in a pitch black portaloo with a surprise on the back of a toilet seat! And big yes to baby wipes, baby wipes and dry shampoo!
    xxxx

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  2. I havent been to a festival in years, but this guide really made me smile and I will defo keep it all in mind if I end up at one next year :) Haha I second Rosie above, playsuits are bad enough when youre drunk and in a club. Never mind drunk and in a pitch black portaloo! :( Gross! Anyways, fab wee post girlie xx

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  3. Ps. I dont know what I'm wearing for the wedding yet, but luisa has good taste so I'm sure its gonna be lovely! Fingers crossed :p Good luck at your sisters wedding! Hope it goes well :) xx

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  4. Haha - excellent post. Never experienced welly chafing but sounds like something to avoid.

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  5. Oh gosh, I am off to Bestival, having never been to a festival before. I'm freaking out.

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    1. Don't freak out, it'll be really fun :) Just take lots of layers and a decent sized over the shoulder bag for when you're in the crowds. If you feel horrible in the morning brush your teeth first and you'll feel loads better. Always works :) It can get quite chilly in the night so bring a wooly hat as well. Aww I'm getting jealous now :( have fun!

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